Tracing Constellations

One of May’s posts for the stargazers over at PsychicsForetell.  

I’ve only recently begun to study the science of the stars.  I used to kind of think astrology was, well, a little hokey.  Most horoscopes I would read were so vague it could apply to anyone reading.   They were pumped out for everyone in the newspaper.  How could I believe every Virgo in the world was going to have a rough day and every Libra would receive great news?  I just never connected to it.

Then one night I was standing outside staring at Orion’s belt.  The sky was big that night and I saw more stars than I had in a long long time.  I was using Orion’s belt to find Sirius the way my seafaring grandfather had done before when my mind became as clear as the sky.  I thought, how can there not be something about the stars?  Some kind of divine system, a key to understanding the cosmic intelligence that keeps this whole magnificent show going?

In that moment, something just clicked.  I connected.  I started thinking about how we can use the moon and stars to tell the time.  Our star, the Sun, by day and all the other stars in our sky by night.  We can tell the season and name the month by the positions of the constellations in the sky.  We can count the passage of months by the phases of moon.

And the moon is so close, its motion creates the tides.  And while the moon’s light may only be a reflection of the Sun, it is the moon’s position in the sky determines just how much of that light gets to shine upon us in the dark of night.  The Sun, our Earth’s prime source of energy, creates the Earth’s environment.  And it does so all within the tight tolerance of heat and light necessary for all this life, as we are currently experiencing it, to exist.  How can there not be something to the primal dance of the stars across the sky?  How can the moon’s waxing and waning with the ocean’s ebb and flow not also have a pull upon us?

So what do I think now of astrology?

Well, I don’t think it is hokey.  That’s for damn sure.  Everything exists in just the right balance to keep this material world together.   It all must move in such a  precise way for this fixed space and time to stay materialized.  And if I had spent as much time as the ancients staring at the play of the cosmos instead of a television, I might truly understand how these energies affect us, individually and collectively.  And I might actually then fully innerstand how the energies that were at play when I materialized on this earth have shaped my receptivity and reactivity to the ebbs and flows of the energy around me now.

I know the study of the stars is much deeper than words printed “for amusement purposes”.  I also know that statement is a disclaimer for some astrologists and a true representation of others.  And that’s fine.  It isn’t just for entertainment any longer for me though.  Things are starting to come together.   In the clarity of that night, I found a sincere reverence for the order of nature and a deep thirst for new information that will connect the dots.  And now I know where to look to quench it.   Up.

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Oh the Places We’ll Go . . .

Another piece written for the stargazers over at PsychicsForetell.  

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So often I have read in my spiritual journey that to attain true enlightenment I must be without desire. I struggled with this one for a long time. How do I be a desireless entrepreneur? How do I have no desires but remain motivated to succeed in life? How is that possible?

Then I worked it out in my head, actually in a blog I had to write about desire. I discovered it wasn’t about being actually desireless but about not allowing my desire to be the be-all-end-all of my world. I discovered that I couldn’t let my desires turn into conditions.

That’s where I had stumbled before. I would set a goal and that goal would become a condition that must be met for me to feel worthy, happy, or good about myself. So by this logic, until I attained my goal, I couldn’t be worthy, happy or good. Happiness is not conditional. It is a state of being, a perspective, a choice. In other words, my happiness was contingent on attaining something external and in doing so, I had effectively blocked everything else out from my vision. Until that goal was reached, everything else didn’t matter. And the reality is that most of my life resides in the “everything else”.

So in understanding this, I separated the outcome from the desire. I focused on the desire only as much as to discern the best direction to take and then allowed life to unfold that way it just does. In that way, I am not so far-sighted I miss what is right in front of my face in the present. In that way I am living in the present, which is the only place we can actually live.

But how do I apply this understanding? I no longer make my desire my destination but instead just a part of my navigation. It not only eliminates the contingency mentality where I can only have happiness if I get there, but it also allows me even more room to grow in more directions than can be allowed with a linear have/have not scenario.

Instead of being focussed on the picture of myself living in my dream reality (which I haven’t lived so therefore don’t really know what that looks like), I focus on the pieces of that dream reality that are within my reach now and use them to start moving forward.

I weave my life using the warp strings I know are part of my Truth. The foundation of all my desires: Love, Integrity, Gratitude, Joy, Compassion and Faith. My weft strings that make up my picture, those I will choose in the moment. The colors and patterns will evolve as they will and the picture will be what it will be. I will not bind myself to weaving some still life picture of a place I haven’t been to. Not when the vibrancy of this fluid life is here begging me to jump in and create with whatever love is available to me now.

So yes, I do still have desires just not ones that are fixed in space and time, but that move with the dance of life. I desire to grow and fully express to my highest potential. I don’t dare limit my potential by picturing what that is and making that picture my focus. I focus on the weaving with love and joy in my heart and I have tenacious faith that my finished piece will be the more beautiful than I can imagine for it will be an expression of a life truly lived. And what can be more beautiful than that?

Weave your life upon your truths and allow the art of your life to unfold how it will. Do not limit yourself with a picture of there from here. Become yourself by creating your art from here to anywhere your heart leads.

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Office Cube Survival

Another of April’s posts for Psychics Foretell.  

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It is an all too common story.  You are a spiritual warrior.  You strive to be a source of clarity and peace to all around you.  You work on your spiritual game like an athlete in training.  You feed yourself with the right foods, feed your mind with the right thoughts, mediate with the right intentions, and constantly look for ways to enlighten yourself and become a better human being.

And then it’s time to go to work out in corporate America.  And let’s just say it ain’t no dream job.  In fact it is a nightmare.  Maybe you push meaningless paperwork across your desk in your windowless cubicle and feel undervalued, unmotivated, and have a restlessness about wasting all this precious time doing something that makes you feel like less.  Or you feel an unhealthy amount of stress over some quota that means nothing at all in the grand scheme of your life whether it is hit or missed.  And you suffer through endless meetings that go nowhere while sitting across from that guy whose incompetence is visible to all but management and  you ignore the bickering between two department heads as you wonder if that guy’s incompetence is strategic or true stupidity.  And either way, you find yourself imagining shaking the cuss out of him.  And you do this day in and day out all for the mighty dollar dollar bill y’all.

Before Daffy Ducking out of my cubicle to pursue my own gig, I felt this pain.  For more years than I care to admit, I undersold my life energy to get really good at something that, as far as I can tell, meant absolutely nothing to anyone in the end.  It was one of those “if we want to know your opinion, we will tell you it” kind of environments poorly hidden behind posted mission statements and motivational posters that gave an appearance of giving a shit about morale.  It seems to be the way at too many offices these days.

So how do spiritual warriors cope when they find themselves stuck in the rat race, even if only temporarily?  Well here are a few strategies that I found to be effective in keeping my sanity and maybe some can be useful in your office.

Imagine you are on a sit com. Yep.  Pretend you are on The Office.  This is great in the situations where the people you have to interact with just ain’t your kind of people.  If you have security cameras, look at them as if they are your audience.   If not, just imagine the camera.  When said people come to your desk, give your camera a look after they leave.  You know the look.  The one that says, “Really?”  Hell, talk to it if you want.  If they catch you, they will probably think you are bat-shit crazy and avoid you in the future.  Win-win.

Play music. This may not be possible in every office setting but if you can, play it!  If you have to keep it quiet for those around you and don’t have to work the phones, use earbuds.  Pick something that makes you happy, something positive.  Or if your work doesn’t require a high level of attention, play a podcast or a comedy routine.  Learn something new, expand your mind, or make yourself laugh.

Take your breaks. I remember working through breaks in the hopes of catching up or getting done earlier.  But there really was no catching up or being done.  So I started utilizing my breaks to do mini yoga sessions.  I spent most lunch breaks doing headstands on a grassy patch between the shipping lane and the parking lot.  But if yoga ain’t your thing, go for a walk, go outside and breathe, or if it gets really bad one day, go scream in your car until the frustration passes and you start laughing as you realize how crazy you look to anyone watching.  Just go do something that gives you a mini reboot to help get you through the day.

Find your tribe. Find the people at work that get it the way you do.  The ones that build you up or crack you up.  There is a lot of grace to be found in humor.  Maybe have a motto.  (Example: I had “Illegitimi non carborundum” on my computer screen – it means “don’t let the bastards grind you down”.)  Or maybe whistle the mockingjay call from Hunger Games when you see each other on bad days just to say you are in this together.  Whatever.  Find people that help you stay strong.  If you have tribe in HR, email them when you are feeling especially feisty to find out the company policy on b*slapping a co-worker.  Obviously you aren’t going to actually slap anyone (really don’t do it!) but asking if you can sure does take the edge off.

I’m sure there are other ways to keep yourself sane when you are in a less than ideal job situation.  These are just a few tried and true methods I used that worked for me.  In the end, I had to face the fact that I wasn’t right for that place.  I’m motivated by growth and at the time that place had no room for me.   And that is okay.  And maybe that is where you are at too.  Or maybe you just need to find a way to make it more pleasant knowing you make your real living outside of work.   Whatever keeps you from losing all that glung glung zen you work so hard to maintain, do it.  Remember that no job is more valuable than your health.  When work has you stressing, reframe the situation with that perspective.  Illegitimi non carborundum!

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Good Vibrations

Originally written in April for Psychics Foretell.  

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How messed up is it that I have lived parts of my life as if everyone’s opinion carries greater weight than my own.  Just like that saying, I used to stifle the urge to dance because, well, I’m not a great dancer and I didn’t want to be the next bad dancing video gone viral. I’d stay put despite my tapping toes and heartfelt want to dance. It was better to not make a fool of myself than to have fun. I wouldn’t want to try certain things because I worried I wasn’t good enough, wasn’t smart enough, wasn’t whatever-I-believed-everyone-else-was enough.

And yet when I thought, I would think as if no one is listening. I would be as nasty as I want. As foolish and unkind. As unforgiving and critical. I would allow these vile qualities to thrive in my head-speak which I would find repulsive if I heard out loud. My nasty tirade would stream on mercilessly as if no soul could hear. But someone was listening. Me. Oh and the entire universe.

The same universal energy at play in the stars, in the planets, and in the oceans is at play in our beings. We each have a slice of this life force to use however we will. That power is not outside of us but within. So in that way, we are our own source. We are co-creators of this universe. When we speak to ourselves in our minds, we would do well to remember this truth for we are speaking in front of all the powers that be. All the powers that create and destroy and create again. Our thoughts shape our reality. The energy of our thoughts is the product of what we feed our minds and becomes the vibration in this world we tune into and sing along with whether we realize it or not.

There is a higher frequency of my mind where I can dance giving zero cusses what anyone might think because the voice of my joy is clearer on this channel than the voice of my worries. If anyone can’t be down with me because I like to dance (albeit poorly), I understand that they ain’t the people I came to get down with anyways. And that is okay. I need to surround myself with vibrations that will elevate me on this journey. And everything I see, hear, taste, and touch carries a vibration.

I control how I perceive my world by choosing the frequencies I surround myself with and choosing the vibrations I shake with. If I have fed my mind, heart and body with the energies of Truth and Love, all will be right in my world. When my world is right, I’m in harmony with the universal song that makes the whole world go ‘round. And that right there is my jam.   Ooo I think I wanna dance.

Dance your body like nobody is watching and speak to yourself like you are conversing with the entire universe. Because you are. Change your dialogue, change your frequency, change your world.

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Healing Journey: Inspire ~ For Larry ~ Getting to Terrapin

May’s theme post for Nourishing Storm.  Inspiration doesn’t always come easy.  This was inspired by my nephew, Larry, who will live forever in my heart.

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I am inspired in the truest sense of the word.  Spire means breath.  And I am breathing still.  I have life within me.  My muse today isn’t kind.  This day’s inspiration is quite painful.  But inspiration strikes however it will.

They come unannounced, these moments that remind me of what is most important in life.  These moments that rob me of my breath and force purpose into my next inhale.  To draw life within again.  I let the breath mingle with my soul hoping to hold it there but knowing I must exhale.  And I exhale a part of my life back out into the wind.

We share the same breath, you and I and everything.  The same wind.

Drawn within and released back out again to go on inspiring as it may.  With the grace of a gentle breeze through my hair, with the joy of a playful whirlwind of leaves or, as it has me now, with the full force of a fierce tempest through my soul.  Same wind.

I draw it in again.  Same air you exhaled.  I let life back in.  Let this breath fill me up with everything it has.  I hold it in my lungs, hold it in my heart.  I let it inspire me to love harder. Let it stir me in its bittersweet way. Then let it go.  Off into the gales that whip around me, off with a piece of my love for you. That like the wind, you will go on forever.

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Light and Dark: Spring Cleaning

Okay.  I’ve been a bit lax with posting my work lately.  This is from a few weeks ago, posted on PsychicsForetell.  More to follow in the next few days.  Feel free to check out what’s new over on their site 🙂

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I’ve been itching for spring for months.  I did all my dark work in the winter.  I sat with my roots and gave them nourishment.  I got centered in my earthy energy.  Now it’s time for some fire.  But just as I think I’m ready to get creating, she calls out.  “Oh don’t do that.  What if you aren’t strong enough yet!”  She is my negative mind.

Kundalini yoga recognizes 3 mental bodies:  positive, negative and neutral.  The positive and negative are the poles of our mental being.  Neutral is our middle ground and is the ideal state of mind, the meditative mind.  But I know for myself, sometimes that meditative state ain’t so easy to get to.

My polar south, my negative side, likes to have her say.  Especially when I am wanting to try something new.  She likes to point out what could go wrong.   It is her job.   I beat her up mercilessly because she can be ugly and scary.  I keep her in a dark corner of my soul that I know needs some springtime loving.  But she is so hard to love sometimes.

She is empowered by my fear.  As well she should be.  Her only purpose is to do whatever needs to be done to save my life.  She is that healthy sense of fear that urges me to be careful as I enter a dark alley or, more likely, compels me to go another way.  Sometimes, in extreme cases, she needs to take over.  If I ever were to find myself having to truly fight for my life, she would be the one to appear out of that bleak hopelessness and save me.

I could go down some seriously ugly rabbit holes with the brutal, raw and gross (as in not subtle) aspects of myself that she embodies.  But I must remember that keeping myself physically safe is the only place my negative self serves me.   At any level other than material, her fear is not real but instead a reflection of the punishment I give myself for being capable of such dark thoughts and emotions.  I like to think I am not capable of brutality, even to save myself. I am a loving being, aren’t I?  But whenever I feel the intense heat of anger, especially of the mama bear variety, I have no doubt I’m capable of all kinds of ugly.  And so the mental beatings have continued.

But lately I understand more and more about energy.  I see how I am fighting my own expansion when I beat myself up for my unpleasant, negative self.  I don’t want her gone.  She is my deepest protector when something horrible strikes and she fights well.  I should know.   I’ve fought and lost to her for over forty years!  She isn’t going anywhere.

So I am calling a truce.  She is me at my most basic, physical level.  She is my animal nature which I have evolved from as I learned to walk upright and make decisions on the course of my life.  She will have her say and I trust that I have worked enough on enlightenment to discern when her say is valid.   If her fear isn’t contained to the visceral level, it is existing at too high a frequency within my being.  And I have the power to choose the frequency I tune into each moment.

I am no longer a divided mind.  And I can now begin to sow the seeds that will provide sustenance for the year ahead with my soul all in.  I can now move forward into the light half of the year with true integrity understanding my beauty and my ugliness and how they each need to be or I wouldn’t be. Balance is the universal key.

Have you accepted all the pieces of you?  Have you embraced your north and south poles knowing both are necessary to fix you in this dimension of time?  Know your boundaries so you can know your center.  And from there find your own particular harmony with this divine universe that we exist within as we also create it.  The fresh energy of spring abounds.  What plans will your undivided self make manifest?

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Healing Journeys: Energize ~ What’s Your Frequency

April’s theme blog for the beautiful beings at Nourishing Storm.  Visit their site to see what’s new and good.

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We are magnetic, electric beings wrapped in this human experience of life. Each born with our own vibration, each sharing our own special blend of magic with the world. Our vibrations carry our truth to everyone around us.   Our energy tells our story before any words are spoken.

It is important to remember we are energetic beings at our core.  We spend so much time working on our physical bodies, our temporary rides, because we see them.  But that stardust magic on the inside, it needs our care too.

Our souls speak in vibes.  A well fed soul has a steady, genuine vibe that can be felt even when the body it inhabits is quiet and still.  A malnourished soul is easily lost in the din of the world, its truth masked in static or hidden entirely by a pirate station on the dial.

It’s like this: The universal source is broadcasting live all day and all night. The material world and everyone in it is also broadcasting live all day and all night. The universe has one channel and it is the Truth. The material world owns way more property.  All these other channels are playing perceptions of this universal truth.  Some are harmonious, some rebellious, but all are fixed in this time.  Whereas the Truth is timeless and when we tune in, we understand that we too are eternal beings.

So how do we feed our Truth?  How do we energize our souls so that we can be sure we are broadcasting the songs we are meant to share instead of amplifying some other station?

We start by tuning in our dials to the Source to reboot.  It is perhaps the softest sound on the dial and can be found in the stillness.  But once found, it vibrates in time with the rhythm at our core.  It is the vibration of pure, unconditional love.  And it can be recognized as it calls forth our gratitude for and acceptance of all that is in our world.  In that way, we are called back to our own true vibration.  One that is unlike any other in existence.

From here we can discern which stations in this space resonate in kind with our Truth and which create a drag and cause static.  If our energy is strong, we are inspired by other’s tunes without losing our own and can inspire others without needing them to sing along.  Those that resonate affirm our paths and keep our signal strong.  Those that throw mixed signals can help us find compassion and compel us to sing louder of the love we have to share.  And those that don’t resonate offer opportunities to build our strength in staying true to ourselves.

To stay loyal to the truth of our souls, we must energize ourselves from sources of real sustenance.  The energy we draw in, through all of our senses, becomes the energy we put out.  If we want to build our bodily tissues in a healthy way, we need to give our bodies the proper nutrients.   And just like feeding our bodies, we need to replenish our energetic stores in healthy ways as well.

By being ever mindful of the energies at play in each moment and choosing wisely the energies we allow to mingle with our souls, we decide the frequency of our vibrations.  When we energize ourselves in ways that harmonize with the Truth, we rock with the vibes we were born to share with the world.  And truly, there is no greater gift we can offer the world than our own authenticity.

Energize, harmonize, and realize yourself.   There is nothing more beautiful than the pure song of a soul in unity with the universe.

“Love is a sacred reserve of energy; it is like the blood of spiritual evolution.”- Pierre Teilhard de Chardin

 

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