Showing My Work…… Why I Need to Meditate

my journalCrazy how hard it is to quiet the mind. So hard to focus on the task at hand, whatever that task may be. I can’t seem to truly give anything my undivided attention. Divided. It is what it is. My energy is spread out and divided among so many things in my life. I need to take the time to draw it together. My energy. This takes practice – to pull it all within.

Visit a place where I can check in on myself. I realize as I write, this is a kind of reset for me. After I draw all of my energy I’ve spread out into the world . . . draw it back within and just before I release it back out, there is a pause. A quiet space of timeless time.

The world and its worries and drama, the energy drains I forget to unplug, they all fall away and an internal dialogue begins. I find this space when my constant stream of thought becomes a droning, white noise. It’s there but my attention is not. Instead my attention is on my inner voice. This voice knows what I honestly, purely desire from this life. There is no judgement because there is no motive to these wants. This space excludes the ego and it’s need for status and validation. It denies me entrance until my heart is open. My heart can only open when it is safe from ego’s ways. Once within, I only hear my beautiful, unique, authentic voice that comes from deep within and everything without feels a little less complicated.

The things I never realized I was still invested in and things that don’t actually need my attention, things that don’t serve me on this divine journey, become apparent. And in this space I agree to let them go. I can then reallocate my energy to be in line with my now remembered direction. The direction that I lost when all the little things that don’t matter mattered mostly because they were so loud in my mind. I can now focus and be less divided.

I believe my energy is not unlimited. I may draw from an unlimited source but I can truly only give my attention (my energy) to a finite number of things if I want to stay authentically and joyfully engaged in life. I must reset as often as I can so I can be my best me. The me I know I already am within and strive to be without.

About the.way.i.bee

Mother, Wife, Healer, Hopeful Suburban Homesteader. . . Words are my mind's tools; writing, my soul's craft; this circus of life, my heart's muse.
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