Another piece written for the stargazers over at PsychicsForetell.
So often I have read in my spiritual journey that to attain true enlightenment I must be without desire. I struggled with this one for a long time. How do I be a desireless entrepreneur? How do I have no desires but remain motivated to succeed in life? How is that possible?
Then I worked it out in my head, actually in a blog I had to write about desire. I discovered it wasn’t about being actually desireless but about not allowing my desire to be the be-all-end-all of my world. I discovered that I couldn’t let my desires turn into conditions.
That’s where I had stumbled before. I would set a goal and that goal would become a condition that must be met for me to feel worthy, happy, or good about myself. So by this logic, until I attained my goal, I couldn’t be worthy, happy or good. Happiness is not conditional. It is a state of being, a perspective, a choice. In other words, my happiness was contingent on attaining something external and in doing so, I had effectively blocked everything else out from my vision. Until that goal was reached, everything else didn’t matter. And the reality is that most of my life resides in the “everything else”.
So in understanding this, I separated the outcome from the desire. I focused on the desire only as much as to discern the best direction to take and then allowed life to unfold that way it just does. In that way, I am not so far-sighted I miss what is right in front of my face in the present. In that way I am living in the present, which is the only place we can actually live.
But how do I apply this understanding? I no longer make my desire my destination but instead just a part of my navigation. It not only eliminates the contingency mentality where I can only have happiness if I get there, but it also allows me even more room to grow in more directions than can be allowed with a linear have/have not scenario.
Instead of being focussed on the picture of myself living in my dream reality (which I haven’t lived so therefore don’t really know what that looks like), I focus on the pieces of that dream reality that are within my reach now and use them to start moving forward.
I weave my life using the warp strings I know are part of my Truth. The foundation of all my desires: Love, Integrity, Gratitude, Joy, Compassion and Faith. My weft strings that make up my picture, those I will choose in the moment. The colors and patterns will evolve as they will and the picture will be what it will be. I will not bind myself to weaving some still life picture of a place I haven’t been to. Not when the vibrancy of this fluid life is here begging me to jump in and create with whatever love is available to me now.
So yes, I do still have desires just not ones that are fixed in space and time, but that move with the dance of life. I desire to grow and fully express to my highest potential. I don’t dare limit my potential by picturing what that is and making that picture my focus. I focus on the weaving with love and joy in my heart and I have tenacious faith that my finished piece will be the more beautiful than I can imagine for it will be an expression of a life truly lived. And what can be more beautiful than that?
Weave your life upon your truths and allow the art of your life to unfold how it will. Do not limit yourself with a picture of there from here. Become yourself by creating your art from here to anywhere your heart leads.