And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung . . .

imageI’ve always just kind of hoped I’d find this one great truth about myself that, once discovered, would open me to understanding my purpose.  The more I dug for it, the deeper it hid.

I’ve searched for meaning in books, in music, in nature, just waiting for something to hit me and I’d finally get what it’s all about.  All the inspirational texts seem to carry the same message: Love, Compassion, Positive Vibrations, Let Go, Get Over Yourself, Be Good People.  It all makes sense and I believe it all to be true.  But it doesn’t reveal my purpose.

Every now and then I’d find words that spoke directly to my Truth, this Truth as yet undefined.  These words would pluck a soul string and sing in resonance with its tune.  And in these moments, I would start to remember something….  the words?  The dance?  I’d then begin to force myself to remember, dissecting it until the tune was lost.  I would be left just on the verge of knowing.

I began to read Dr. Wayne Dyer’s book: Inspiration: Your Ultimate Calling after catching an interview with him on the Hayhouse World Summit’s free web event.  I got part way through the first chapter as he explained how an apparent coincidence led him to choose the title.   He didn’t go in to what it meant to him but just how he knew it was right.  And out of nowhere, or probably out of the greatest somewhere, I heard that familiar tune my soul knows but my mind doesn’t.  And for whatever reason, in that space of time, I was able to see that all this time I’ve been looking for the wrong thing.

It was something about the use of the word “calling”.  It sang and I understood.  Calling holds so much more than purposePurpose just seems more concrete and too chosen; where calling is more fluid and deeply understood.  Purpose holds a sense of determination and seeks a destination where calling holds a sense of agreement and seeks a path.  I let go of finding my purpose and settled into the tune that was calling.  I had to find a pen.

When I write, my soul sings its song.  I realize so perfectly that it is my calling.  With this realization, I don’t envision books deals or fame.  I just know I am a writer.  It connects me to something divine.  My calling doesn’t show me where I’m meant to go; it just leads me there.  I have no idea where the path will lead.  I only know the way is my own.

About the.way.i.bee

Mother, Wife, Healer, Hopeful Suburban Homesteader. . . Words are my mind's tools; writing, my soul's craft; this circus of life, my heart's muse.
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5 Responses to And my tunes were played on the harp unstrung . . .

  1. maria says:

    Heeyyyy! I also was able to catch some of the Hay House World Summit. Very inspirational! Obviously, for you too. Just let it flow! You have a gift to share. Many people blindly walk the planet, and many like yourself, actually realize the Universe is within and is all. Your Soul WILL sing when you release it. Envision your words inspiring and touching other Souls.

  2. Amen, sister! Sing along!! And please please please wear your red lipstick when you ride that cycle!!

  3. Brighid says:

    Yes! Nikki, it’s always been there. Continue to ‘call’ it forth and there will be a time where the call and the calling merge as one. Keep writing. Keep saying yes. And stoke the fire in you heart. It is your service to the world, dear one ❤

    • Funny how they call those moments the “AHA” moments. Sometimes is it more like a “Duh!” Like tearing the house apart looking for your sunglasses sitting on top of your head…Duh! I think you remembered your calling much earlier and I’m thankful for it. A true healer 🙂

  4. Erica says:

    You’re on your way, girlie!

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